othellovonryan | Seasons Inbox

The hardware is put together and I'm just about done with the schematics for the MRI machine. I should be able to do it today or tomorrow, just need a place that can contain a machine the size of a small car.

Wonderful.

I have a line on some places. You want to meet at your place in a bit and I can take you and whatever equipment needs moved? Portals are useful for that.

They are very useful for that. Portals are a major quality of life improvement feature.

But yes, come by in about two hours and I should have the entire thing built in my head.

I'm not sure if I could teach you those, but we can try making it work with your tech and mystic abilities.

I'll see you then.

Unfortunately, I will need to pass on portals for now. Leo is quite good at them, and with how difficult and energy intensive they are on the rest of our bodies, I think it'd be best to focus my energy elsewhere. My family doesn't have a need for me to learn.

[Also Leo has some ISSUES he doesn't want to needlessly provoke. Donnie knowing medic stuff is about practicalities for Leo's sake, but the portals are usually not a life or death thing and even a bedridden Leo can make them as long as he can be conscious.]

[Donnie makes Many Decisions because it'd better for his family.]

See you then.

Checking in after 24 hours as instructed.

I feel pretty good. The dizziness passed quickly enough, and my mood is indescribably better than it was so I'm more or less attributing that brief bout of feeling hazy to adrenaline.

That's good to hear. Have you had any exposure with the subject?

I made a point to see him, yes. It was so much easier than before. No worries, no being so overly careful. Seems like your treatment worked like a charm.

But there is still a level of fondness, correct? Since you still wanted the friendship feelings.

I still feel friendly towards him. Or I shouldn't say "still" because it's the first time, I guess. But it's very comfortable.

So yes, still friendship feelings. At least until he does something stupid.

Was it love at first sight originally?

Well, that is just the way of any close relationship.

Close, yes. From very soon after we met, I knew I'd never love anyone else.

Maybe I could now, if things with him go nowhere... that is something I wouldn't even have been able to type out before, it was unthinkable. But now if there's going to be any love between us it can grow mutually instead of me tapping my foot waiting for him. And if not, he wouldn't want me hung up on him for eternity so it's better for everyone.

I don't know what the hell you did in there, but it worked like a charm.

Oh.

I'm not entirely sure if that particular connection can form again.

Did you want that to be possible?

Is that so?

Well, not a big deal. I wouldn't have done this if I thought there was any hope of that. I don't regret it.

It depends on how much neural plasticity an immortal has, but to stop love, but not all emotion meant having to put a number of blockers on that particular pathway. It might be possible, but that path would have to go an extremely long way around.

It's fine, don't worry about it. I'm actually happy right now, so I'll take this even if I can't fall for him again. If the worst that happens is I get my best friend back without it being weird, then there's no problem.

True. Even when there's feelings on his end, its only really a problem when it becomes all consuming. In my experience, at least.

If he was going to get all consuming feelings for me, it would have happened long ago. Trust me, this is better. He'll be happier with me more able to relax around him.

It does seem like it would have happened before all the drama. Just keep me updated on any major changes. There is also the possibility the blocks heal themselves entirely, immortality is a difficult factor to account for.

It'll be what it is, like I said I don't regret anything. He and I both needed to breathe, and I need to figure out who I am without being his shadow.

True. It can be a very real eye opening experience when you have to live without those certain people, as important as they are.

If all this accomplishes is that I'm less of an albatross around his neck then it was worth it.

Time will tell, I guess. When do you want me to check in next, or should I let you know when I see you for training? [ Which is probably pretty regular. ]

Pretty sure he'd need therapy himself if you loving him was that bad.

Training should work as a check in, unless you notice a dramatic change from what you've been experiencing already. If there's ever a dramatic shift, let me know right away. My sleep schedule is always a mess, so don't worry about late wake up.

You've read the Journey writeup, even knowing it's incomplete what do you think about his need for therapy?

I'm taking that as permission to show up at all hours to keep you limber.

If he hasn't had any since then? He'd need a whole lot.

Do not touch, or you will get bit, spiny softshells do not mess around with their jaw strength. You'll also want to be sure you're registered for any security systems.

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