Seasons Inbox

[othellovonryan]

tbd

Comments

Re: February 7, morning

[castaside]

A lot of reasons. Mostly... I know nobody would like what I did, but that's not the problem. The trouble is that I don't think they'd understand it.

Re: February 7, morning

[othellovonryan]

Wouldn't they want you to move on?

Re: February 7, morning

[castaside]

It isn't that. I'm sure they do. But... remember how you said everyone was upset that you did surgery on yourself, even though it worked?

Sometimes people want you to do a thing in the way they think is best. And they maybe don't realize that getting over him is the only thing I've ever failed to do, and I failed at it for centuries. I failed at it through my own death.

Re: February 7, morning

[othellovonryan]

Ooooh.

Okay, now I get it.

Though I wouldn't necessarily say death is a deal breaker when it comes to someone important. No matter how messed up it was. Maybe it does for others, but depending on the context, it can be surprisingly easy to keep from affecting emotions.

Re: February 7, morning

[castaside]

Normally when someone kills you, it tends to put a damper on these feelings. In circumstances different than the Temple and whenever else, of course. [ Aka when you actually get a choice about whether to murder people and death is permanent. ]

But the point is they won't get it, so I don't want to explain it because it'll lead to arguments, and it's not like we can go backwards.

Re: February 7, morning

[othellovonryan]

That wasn't a death game.

It was a fucked up situation, to be sure, but it had nothing to do with those who ran the place. I knew what I was walking into, I knew there was a good chance I wasn't walking out, but I had to walk in anyway. The lack of death's permanency didn't really affect the situation.

I had honestly not thought about the after, just that I had to go right then, regardless of risks.

Could you just say you got over him? You've been trying for a while?

Re: February 7, morning

[castaside]

I did say that. I got over him, I'd been working on it for a while, and that I thought they'd be happy for me. But the questions persist, from all over.

But my feelings about MK changed too... Wukong's apprentice. Maybe it's because they're so closely connected. It's nothing I can't compensate for, I just have to be more conscious of it.

Re: February 7, morning

[othellovonryan]

Sudden emotional changes can be cause for concern.

Changed? Changed how?

Re: February 7, morning

[castaside]

It's like I just feel... hollow? Maybe that's the wrong word. But my feelings for him and Wukong both feel dull. Or hard to reach.

Re: February 7, morning

[othellovonryan]

Just to clarify, feeling randomly hollow is not a normal occurrence for you, correct?

Re: February 7, morning

[castaside]

It definitely isn't.

Re: February 7, morning

[othellovonryan]

We should do another scan. See what lines MK is lighting up.

Re: February 7, morning

[castaside]

Okay. When?

Re: February 7, morning

[othellovonryan]

Your emotions should be settled, so a time where you've been able to destress a few hours.

Re: February 7, morning

[castaside]

I'm not stressed right now.

[ Sure will be in a few days, though. ]

Re: February 7, morning

[othellovonryan]

Give me an hour. If you have any MK related items, bring those.

Re: February 7, morning

[castaside]

[ He grabs the cloud necklace MK gave him for Christmas and makes his way over when it's time. By "makes his way" he means "shadow portaling", as usual. ]

[ For posterity, the scan will show that his MK (and Wukong, if tested) reactions barely light up any pathways at all, but the mention of almost anyone else lights his brain up into overdrive. ]

February 8, afternoon

[othellovonryan]

Please don't be mad.

Re: February 8, afternoon

[castaside]

Why would I be mad? I'm the one who asked you to go through with it.

We're good, kiddo.

Re: February 8, afternoon

[othellovonryan]

Because I may have made a teeny tiny little bit of

A mistake?

The lines for Wukong and MK are close, but they're not the same. So I may have cut just a slight bit

More than intended.

[Because the other answer is its expanding, but then he wouldn't know why that's happening and Donnie hates not knowing more than making a mistake.]

Re: February 8, afternoon

[castaside]

Is that so?

...Well, we're still good. If there's blame here, it's mine, since it was my idea. It's not your fault, Donnie. All you wanted to do was help me.

Re: February 8, afternoon

[othellovonryan]

It would be the simplest explanation as to what happened. I thought it would be fine since I wasn't actually interacting with bodily fluids, and my hands are usually steady with surgery regardless, but with how small the room for error was, there was likely a slight tremor I never recognized as existing.

Re: February 8, afternoon

[castaside]

Dare I ask for the complicated explanation?

Re: February 8, afternoon

[othellovonryan]

I don't have one.

Re: February 8, afternoon

[castaside]

All right. Well... I'll let you know if there's any more notable changes. Hopefully there isn't, I'm getting bombarded with questions as it is.

[ This is barely a day before MK explodes at him over this, so it probably can be categorized as "oh you sweet summer child". ]