[He gestures to the bed and he looks to the side at his projects and grabs a dagger in a sheath, but the handle is in pieces and grabs a few extra pieces and sets them on the nightstand.]
... though she does take a second to toss her grappling gun, various daggers, and her collapsed bo into her messenger bag, which she sets down somewhere out of the way
[ a long, low grumbly-growl of a groan into his pillow. she isn't shaking or anything quite so dramatic, but she is tense. ]
[ Safe. She's safe here with donnie. No games, no threats, just her and her boyfriend.
Her boyfriend who she trusts and adores and who she thinks, she's pretty sure, she's pretty sure that he'd never use Egg's boon as a weapon against her? Right? ... Maybe as an absolute last resort ...? If he really thought he had no choice-? Because it's not fair to assume never ever, not in a place like this, between how desperate the games can get and corruption nonsense and who knows what else, and -
her chest tightens. she clamps both hands over the back of her neck, over her scarf, and forces herself to breathe. ]
I — [ know, but her throat's getting tight, too; it's hard to get the word out ]
[ damnit ]
[ she nods. matches her breathing to the familiar four-count pattern until the icy vice grip starts to loosen. it takes a few minutes, and she doesn't try to force it. she's with donnie. it's safe. she's allowed to take her time. he'd want her to take her time. ]
[ and slowly, gradually, her shoulders sink. her hands loosen against the back of her neck. she breathes in ... and lets out a sigh. ]
[He knows it's important to wait. He's been on the other side plenty of times, after all. Best to let her breathe with a consistent pattern to breathe.]
[Then as she relaxes, he lets go of her shoulders. Grabs one of the many pillows and pulls off the pillow case and will drop it on the back of her neck. Some extra coverage.]
[ ughhhh this isn't how she wanted this feedback session to go ugh ugh ugh ]
[ shifts one of her hands away from her neck so she can fidget, squishing and squeezing a handful of bedding. she's quiet a while. five minutes at least of keeping herself grounded, focusing on her breathing and the comforting pressure of her boyfriend weighted blanket ]
She … doesn't see scoping out someone else's emotions without seeking permission first as invasive. S'just another sense to her. No different from reading body language and micro-expressions. I disagreed. Politely. Hopefully very politely. [ SHE DID HER BEST and it felt like she was wrestling a panic attack into an over-full suitcase the whole entire time. Proud of herself, but also: aaaaaa ]
... But I phrased my please do not request wrong.
[ The hand still over her neck tightens. ]
S'my bad. She very politely, reasonably, understandably and apologetically pointed out that she couldn't promise never, because this place is what it is and she'd use what tools she has to in defense of her team and loved ones. Which is fair. Can't argue with that. Wouldn't want to. And it's not like I haven't known from the start that Egg's boon is just as much a weapon as a tool to help, you know? S'one of those -
"The knowledge is there but actively thinking about it is a panic attack waiting to happen, so I just don't" things.
[He frowns. He knows there are applications, but it is concerning Tryse focused on how it could be used as a weapon with someone in distress.]
....well. I can't lie and say I don't feel a little miffed by how little grace she gives me for my life experiences if she just views it as another sense. I illegally hack into cameras all the time and I know it's invasive and that has nothing on the boon.
It's important to be aware of when you're invading privacy, that is the only way to keep yourself accountable.
She didn't even grow up with it. Disgruntled huff.
Also her saying that is going to make people less likely to ask for help if she does with just anyone. [There's a reason he doesn't tell his family he records anything before it comes up.]
You also shouldn't feel bad with making an extremely reasonable request and set boundary. Especially when the chances of that outcome are so low. Especially, especially if she talked about it at length when you made it known you were in distress.
Dee, it's — [ She sighs. ] I didn't mind it? Nn — obviously I mind the concept in general, but I get how and why someone might see it differently.
And she wasn't trying to be disrespectful. At all. It felt like the opposite. She couldn't lie and say she wouldn't ever, because even a fraction of a possibility is a possibility. She couldn't just gloss over it, either, because —
[ Untangles her fidgety hand, flappy flappy ]
… She was trying to acknowledge me as someone who also has people to protect and fight for, and —
[ a little huff ]
… It feels weird to say this, but — it's like … she seems to think I'm strong enough that I could be a threat? Complimentary? Like two old-timey warriors tipping their old-timey warrior hats to each other. "I don't want to fight and I hope we never have to, and if we did I'd only go as far as I needed to, but you're too strong to treat with kid gloves."
Which — again, it's weird, because most people here could kick my ass. But still. She wasn't going on about it. She was honest and she was polite.
And I didn't make it clear that I was in distress. I was too busy LARPing. [ Another grumble into the pillow ... ] My issue wasn't with her or how she handled it. Genuinely. I promise.
Okay, first off, most people here could not kick your ass. I had to play dirty in the bunker and let you stab me to keep you where I needed you when you were blind, while I was literally made for battle and had tentacles growing out of me. You are at minimum in the upper half. More likely upper quarter with the forcing people to shapeshift against their wills, that is a spell that has broken many an TTRPG and that's when enemies could make saving throws. Combined with teleportation to allow you to get in close to touch, you are an extremely dangerous person to deal with.
And even if mystic powers were negated, you can pick up Raph without magic. Without powers, it puts you up a lot higher because presumably everyone wouldn't have any.
Second, I will not retract my disgruntled huff because Tryse is also of the opinion that even when someone is literally telling you 'everything is over and done with' to your face, you should still be able to divine you are being deceived.
...the especially, especially is because she can go long, and I have personal experience that its...very hard to follow things when your head is screaming. Its not a pleasant feeling.
... blind and with her powers severely on the fritz in that particular fight, but also, for real: what? ]
I'm not dangerous and I'm definitely not upper half, let alone upper quarter, Donnie, what the fuck. You spent that whole fight actively trying to avoid hurting me, I wouldn't have lasted more than a minute otherwise -
You were also blind and powers on the fritz and also had been recently drugged.
And I still had to let you stab me to hinder your will to fight.
If you wish for an entire threat analysis, I can go on, I have spreadsheets somewhere.
But the basic gist is you have a a strong base that means you're able to adapt no matter the sudden limitations so that you are not easily taken out by the surprise factor, and your abilities have such versatile utility and a nonlinear use that makes them affective even against people with the power to nuke an entire planet because its not about raw power, its about changing the circumstances.
[ with a little whine into the pillow, one that sounds almost pained, ]
Couldn't do math for months. At all. Lost it when my soul got shattered. Someone'd try to teach me and I'd know what they were saying, but it didn't, wouldn't, couldn't make sense.
That's kinda how I feel right now, though? Dunno know how much is the amnesia disconnect or the brain damage or my track record for getting my ass kicked, but - you just melted my brain.
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Please.
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... though she does take a second to toss her grappling gun, various daggers, and her collapsed bo into her messenger bag, which she sets down somewhere out of the way
faceplants into his blankets ]
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[ Safe. She's safe here with donnie. No games, no threats, just her and her boyfriend.
Her boyfriend who she trusts and adores and who she thinks, she's pretty sure, she's pretty sure that he'd never use Egg's boon as a weapon against her? Right? ... Maybe as an absolute last resort ...? If he really thought he had no choice-? Because it's not fair to assume never ever, not in a place like this, between how desperate the games can get and corruption nonsense and who knows what else, and -
her chest tightens. she clamps both hands over the back of her neck, over her scarf, and forces herself to breathe. ]
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[He puts his hands on her shoulders. He squeezes for four seconds, then releases for four seconds, starting the pattern.]
You're safe.
Nothing will touch you with me here.
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[ damnit ]
[ she nods. matches her breathing to the familiar four-count pattern until the icy vice grip starts to loosen. it takes a few minutes, and she doesn't try to force it. she's with donnie. it's safe. she's allowed to take her time. he'd want her to take her time. ]
[ and slowly, gradually, her shoulders sink. her hands loosen against the back of her neck. she breathes in ... and lets out a sigh. ]
Better.
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[Then as she relaxes, he lets go of her shoulders. Grabs one of the many pillows and pulls off the pillow case and will drop it on the back of her neck. Some extra coverage.]
Do you want to talk about it?
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[ pillowcase ]
[ that helps, actually, and she mumble-chirps her gratitude ]
... Egg boon came up.
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How much did Tryse say?
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[ ughhhh this isn't how she wanted this feedback session to go ugh ugh ugh ]
[ shifts one of her hands away from her neck so she can fidget, squishing and squeezing a handful of bedding. she's quiet a while. five minutes at least of keeping herself grounded, focusing on her breathing and the comforting pressure of her boyfriend weighted blanket ]
She … doesn't see scoping out someone else's emotions without seeking permission first as invasive. S'just another sense to her. No different from reading body language and micro-expressions. I disagreed. Politely. Hopefully very politely. [ SHE DID HER BEST and it felt like she was wrestling a panic attack into an over-full suitcase the whole entire time. Proud of herself, but also: aaaaaa ]
... But I phrased my please do not request wrong.
[ The hand still over her neck tightens. ]
S'my bad. She very politely, reasonably, understandably and apologetically pointed out that she couldn't promise never, because this place is what it is and she'd use what tools she has to in defense of her team and loved ones. Which is fair. Can't argue with that. Wouldn't want to. And it's not like I haven't known from the start that Egg's boon is just as much a weapon as a tool to help, you know? S'one of those -
"The knowledge is there but actively thinking about it is a panic attack waiting to happen, so I just don't" things.
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....well. I can't lie and say I don't feel a little miffed by how little grace she gives me for my life experiences if she just views it as another sense. I illegally hack into cameras all the time and I know it's invasive and that has nothing on the boon.
It's important to be aware of when you're invading privacy, that is the only way to keep yourself accountable.
She didn't even grow up with it. Disgruntled huff.
Also her saying that is going to make people less likely to ask for help if she does with just anyone. [There's a reason he doesn't tell his family he records anything before it comes up.]
You also shouldn't feel bad with making an extremely reasonable request and set boundary. Especially when the chances of that outcome are so low. Especially, especially if she talked about it at length when you made it known you were in distress.
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[ A quiet sound of discontent. ]
Dee, it's — [ She sighs. ] I didn't mind it? Nn — obviously I mind the concept in general, but I get how and why someone might see it differently.
And she wasn't trying to be disrespectful. At all. It felt like the opposite. She couldn't lie and say she wouldn't ever, because even a fraction of a possibility is a possibility. She couldn't just gloss over it, either, because —
[ Untangles her fidgety hand, flappy flappy ]
… She was trying to acknowledge me as someone who also has people to protect and fight for, and —
[ a little huff ]
… It feels weird to say this, but — it's like … she seems to think I'm strong enough that I could be a threat? Complimentary? Like two old-timey warriors tipping their old-timey warrior hats to each other. "I don't want to fight and I hope we never have to, and if we did I'd only go as far as I needed to, but you're too strong to treat with kid gloves."
Which — again, it's weird, because most people here could kick my ass. But still. She wasn't going on about it. She was honest and she was polite.
And I didn't make it clear that I was in distress. I was too busy LARPing. [ Another grumble into the pillow ... ] My issue wasn't with her or how she handled it. Genuinely. I promise.
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And even if mystic powers were negated, you can pick up Raph without magic. Without powers, it puts you up a lot higher because presumably everyone wouldn't have any.
Second, I will not retract my disgruntled huff because Tryse is also of the opinion that even when someone is literally telling you 'everything is over and done with' to your face, you should still be able to divine you are being deceived.
...the especially, especially is because she can go long, and I have personal experience that its...very hard to follow things when your head is screaming. Its not a pleasant feeling.
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wait a second. what. what?
... blind and with her powers severely on the fritz in that particular fight, but also, for real: what? ]
I'm not dangerous and I'm definitely not upper half, let alone upper quarter, Donnie, what the fuck. You spent that whole fight actively trying to avoid hurting me, I wouldn't have lasted more than a minute otherwise -
[ mathlady ]
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And I still had to let you stab me to hinder your will to fight.
If you wish for an entire threat analysis, I can go on, I have spreadsheets somewhere.
But the basic gist is you have a a strong base that means you're able to adapt no matter the sudden limitations so that you are not easily taken out by the surprise factor, and your abilities have such versatile utility and a nonlinear use that makes them affective even against people with the power to nuke an entire planet because its not about raw power, its about changing the circumstances.
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[ a perfectly donnie thing for donnie to do, but korone's having Logic Error Issues right now ]
I - what -
[ what? ]
I feel like I can't do math again.
[ so sayeth korone, who is kind of ridiculously good at all things numerical ]
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That's a terrible way to be, math is great.
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Couldn't do math for months. At all. Lost it when my soul got shattered. Someone'd try to teach me and I'd know what they were saying, but it didn't, wouldn't, couldn't make sense.
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I couldn't count for a day and a half and it was torture.
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It sucked. I hated it. I couldn't do cartwheels, either, or tie my hair in pigtails, and a bunch of other stuff. But the math. The math hurt me.
[ uuuugh ]
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[ ... try to pat him.
it only works so well. ]
You'd find a way.
That's kinda how I feel right now, though? Dunno know how much is the amnesia disconnect or the brain damage or my track record for getting my ass kicked, but - you just melted my brain.
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You do have a history of underestimating your value and ability.
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[ pulls a pillow down over her head ]
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1/2
ACTUALLY MAKE THAT MORE i will let you know when I'm done
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still going
DONE
Re: DONE
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