Donatello "the air bud of war crimes" Hamato (
othellovonryan) wrote2023-02-11 05:10 pm
(no subject)
Noise
It starts as just irritation. A metaphorical crawling under your skin. Things are too noisy, too bright, there is too much happening all the time and you can't take it all in-
It sounds so inviting, a freedom from the noise, but its wrong, its wrong, its wrong and the noise is getting louder, mechanical and foreboding as it sees you, it knows you are there, and it wants to make you apart of it.
For a moment, there is quiet.
You breathe.
And fall through water.
It starts as just irritation. A metaphorical crawling under your skin. Things are too noisy, too bright, there is too much happening all the time and you can't take it all in-
Then silence it, make it yours, make it you, take control and destroy what will not submit
It sounds so inviting, a freedom from the noise, but its wrong, its wrong, its wrong and the noise is getting louder, mechanical and foreboding as it sees you, it knows you are there, and it wants to make you apart of it.
Anatawa hitorijanai
For a moment, there is quiet.
You breathe.
And fall through water.

Re: Personal Room
Either way, he's placing the kid down on the bedding area. When he speaks, it's with a gentle tone. ]
Sorry about the cold. Are you hurt anywhere?
[ He's checking for injuries as he asks. ]
Re: Personal Room
[Also glasses he just has taped on his head.]
[He is also Out Cold, remember that brumating deal Crow?]
[But he does seem to be without injuries, at the very least.]
Re: Personal Room
Oops.
Crow sighs. ]
And me without any Fire arts....
[ #WorthIt
He is going to bundle as many blankets as he can to warm the child figure up. ]
Re: Personal Room
[At least there's blankets and]
[There is a feeling in the bed.]
[You are the one who has to make the evil choice. If it has to be made, you have to make it. This is what you can do that they can't, not without the cost being too steep.]
[But the blankets are going to help him warm up.]
Re: Personal Room
[ Crow gets it.
It won't necessarily help with warming him up, but he is going to cast a healing Arts on the child. It's water, but it's warm and bubbly and soothing. ]
Re: Personal Room
[It helps warm him up faster and a small wading pool just forms nearby.]
[Then Donnie groans, eyes opening to look up at Crow.]
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[ His tone is still gentle. ]
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[He sits up.]
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[ So like, he's not as sorry as he COULD be. ]
Would I be right in guessing you're Selfishness?
Re: Personal Room
Why did you help? Don't you hate me? I hurt you, I'm not supposed to hurt friends, that's how you lose friends.
1/2
Re: Personal Room
Aidios, are you serious? You mean with the whole "kidnapping" thing? I won't lie and tell you I'm not mad about it, but I could tell something was wrong. And besides....
[ He taps the kid's chest, right where the heart would be (for a human, at least. IDK my BFF turtle biology). ]
Intentions mean a lot. And I know you were trying to protect them.
Re: Personal Room
I always want to protect all of you. That's what Protectiveness is supposed to do, to make plans, but I know I'm not supposed to cross certain lines.
If I cross those lines, then people won't like me.
Re: Personal Room
It's true it'll piss people off. It could even cross lines you don't normally wanna cross. But you'd be surprised at people's capacity for forgiveness.
You haven't done anything unforgivable. Not yet. If you give them a heartfelt apology and show with your actions that you'll try to learn and do better, I think you'll find that the people who care about you will understand.
And as for me? I don't hate you. Not for this or anything else that you've done. In some ways, I even understand you.
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Supervillains.
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[ Just saying. ]
But I get what you mean. Anyway.... Just keep trusting your loved ones. Listen to them. They'll keep you from going off the ledge.
Re: Personal Room
That's what I always do. I want to be someone they like. Someone they're proud of and want to be around. People they trust.
Even if it means I don't do everything I can to protect them...
Re: Personal Room
It hurts, doesn't it? That you want to do more, keep them from feeling pain, but you can't.
But think about it this way: That holding back? It's also a form of protecting them. Their happiness, their emotional well-being. Their souls. Those are important parts of them, too. You can't always stop them from being hurt, but you can be there for them. Even if you don't have the right words, even if you don't know the right actions. Sometimes, just being by someone's side... it's enough.
And that's a form of protection, too.
Re: Personal Room
...April would say stuff like that. The others don't articulate it as well, but April is pretty good at explaining things when none of them are.
She got mad once, when I got protective of her. She's human. She's so much easier to hurt than the rest of us, but she still wanted to play with us.
[He laughs sheepishly.] She said stuff that was really familiar. That was the first time she learned I had a soft shell.
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[ He nudges Donnie very lightly, a smile on his face. ]
It's good you've got someone like her in your life.
Re: Personal Room
But she's done a lot for me specifically.
I...don't want to make people feel like they can't handle dangerous things. It's maddening when people treat you like glass.
Re: Personal Room
Just don't dwell too much on it. Let 'em know you're sorry and you'll keep trying. And then do it. And maybe you'll falter, you won't be perfect. None of us ever are. But as long as you show people you're willing to keep trying, I think you'll find their capacity for forgiveness and understanding is vast.
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[The child might be teasing you Crow]
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Well.... I understand friendship pretty well. I just... I have my reasons for not wanting them for myself.
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[What is a filter, that don't exist in this room]
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